Define dating vs hanging out
However, I had a lot of fun recently interviewing singles of different ages and places as to their definition of what constitutes a “date” versus “hanging out.” Sound familiar? But I think that depends on how you handle things emotionally, and what your expectations are.) Jessica: A date is when two people, having common interests, participate in a mutually decided upon activity with the intent to analyze each other’s words, actions, and suitability for eternal companionship …my opinion of course. Jennifer: In order to clarify with men about if we are on a date, if a man asks me to hang out with them I ask “you mean like on a date? They will clarify for me and then I can decide do I want to hang or date. Paul: I agree with Jessica, but would add, that is what I would say from a religious standpoint and it is regardless of whether the intent is there to analyze those things…
I was recently divorced and attending classes at UCLA and the Westwood LDS Institute of Religion when Elder and Sister Oaks gave their now classic talks on “Hanging Out.” I was a little amused by the reaction it caused, with singles worrying that he was trying to say that we should never, ever spend time with a group of friends. and regardless of whether there are actually any common interests, because sometimes the date is solely to find out IF there are common interests, because one often does not know and if there are common interests, one often does not even notice they are actually analyzing words, actions and suitability for eternal companionship, as their intent may have only been to go have fun.
But if you are invited over to someone’s place to hang out and don’t leave or do anything, that’s a non-date. It could turn into a date if both people want it to turn into a date, but it’s not presumed.
A first date should be time spent with someone to get to know them and decide if you want to go out on a second date. Also, dates do not need to require ANY money to be spent, I hear that excuse a lot and I think it’s silly. The most fun part of the date was at the house afterward when we played air hockey in his basement!
I think the definition has to do with the intent of the participants.
Matt: A date is spending time with someone, getting to know them on a personal level.
I had the rare opportunity, a few years ago, to live with my oldest niece for two years while she was finishing her teaching license requirements at BYU and I was back at BYU trying to finish my BA.
She was still in the young BYU, early 20’s crowd (and met her husband during that time) and I was attending the “Midsingles Ward” (ages 30-45) that I’m still a member of today.